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Pumpster’s World Famous "Quote, Unquote!"

Featuring the Senate Testimony of Dr. Mary Anne Layden On the Dangers of Porn, Co-Director, Sexual Trauma and Psychopathology Program, Center for Cognitive Therapy University of Pennsylvania!

Original speach found at the fancy U.S. Senate Committee Website.

Layden’s Quote: “Thank you, Senators, for allowing me to speak to you today.”

Layden’s Quote: “Pornography, by its very nature, is an equal opportunity toxin. It is more toxic the more you consume, the “harder” the variety you consume and the younger and more vulnerable the consumer.”

Pumpster’s Unquote: Unlike other toxins, such as nuclear waste, dioxin, lead, and mercury, pornography, by its very nature, is an equal opportunity toxin, and the more toxins of this toxic toxin you consume the more toxic it is!

Layden’s Quote: “An example of Pornography Distortion would include beliefs such as “Sex is not about intimacy, procreation or marriage. Sex is about predatory self-gratification, casual recreation, body parts, violence, feces, strangers, children, animals and using women as entertainment.” All of these are messages regularly sent by pornography.”

Pumpster’s Comment: Although we’re not a really brainy doctor like Dr. Mary Layden, we’re under the impression that porn has no relationship to body parts, violence, feces, children, and animals. These things are not porn, they are perverse fetishes, some illegal, and being aroused by such things is a sign of mental disease. As such, these are not messages “regularly sent by pornography” since they do not constitute porn. We think the Dr. Mary Layden might have some issue of her own if these are the sites she peruses for her studies!

Layden’s Quote: “In all types of violence and addiction, Permission-Giving Beliefs are involved. Examples would include “All men go to prostitutes” “Women like sex mixed with violence” and “Children enjoy sex with adults”. These particular Permission-Giving Beliefs are also common in pornography.”

Pumpster’s Unquote: In all types of violence and addiction, Permission-Giving Beliefs are involved. Examples would include “We must save the Iraqi people from tyranny and locate the weapons of mass destruction” “The killing of innocent children in Iraq has nothing to do with the fact we are good Christians” and “People with medical degrees are intelligent and filled with innovative insight.” These particular Permission-Giving Beliefs are also common in the Senate chamber.

Layden’s Quote: “The myth that women are sexually aroused by engaging in behaviors that are actually sexually pleasuring to men is a particularly narcissistic invention of the pornography industry. This is sexual mis-education.”

Pumpster’s Unquote: The myth that women are sexually aroused by giving blow jobs, being eaten out, getting fucked, being fingered, being kissed, and using sexual aids is a narcissistic invention of the pornography industry. All women are fridged and are incapable of experiencing sexual pleasure, just like me!

Layden’s Quote: “The executive who goes to his office and logs on to the Internet porn sites at 9:00 AM and logs off at 5:00 PM is out of control and risks a great deal.”

Pumpster’s Comment: We thing Dr. Mary Layden could only be discussing an executive who works in the porn industry, and if so, this is certainly not “out of control” behavior, it is normal! Other than that, we’re pretty sure she pulled this scenario out of her butt.

Layden’s Quote: “Research also indicates and my clinical experience supports that 40% of sex addicts will lose their spouse, 58% will suffer sever financial losses, and 27-40% will lose their job or profession.”

Pumpster’s Comment: Assuming “loss of spouse” refers to divorce and not death by porn, doesn’t every living human being on the planet suffer, or have a good chance to suffer, divorce, financial loss, or being laid off? And which is it, 27% or 40%? Come on, Dr. Layden, tell us the truth--you just pulled those numbers out of your poonani, didn’t you?

Layden’s Quote: “Those whose marriages don’t end, may find themselves increasing dissatisfied with their spouse’s appearance and sexual behavior and increasingly sexually acting out which leads to an increase in sexually transmitted diseases.”

Pumpster’s Comment: WTF? Wow, that gin went straight to your head, eh, doc!

Layden’s Quote: “This material is potent, addictive and permanently implanted in the brain.”

Pumpster’s Comment: If this is true, why do we keep renewing our membership to Mosteroticteens.com? Possibly being such a brainy doctor, Mary Layden has one of those fancy photographic memory thingies. Sadly, we have to look at the same photos day after day, since, no matter how hard we stare, it just doesn’t seem to become permanently implanted in our brains. :(

Layden’s Quote: “Those who use pornography have also been shown to be more likely to engage in illegal behavior as well.”

Pumpster’s Quote: Those who engage in illegal behavior have also been shown to be more likely to use pornography as well.

Layden’s Quote: “Those who use pornography are more likely to go to prostitutes, engage in domestic violence, stranger rape, date rape, and incest. These behaviors should not be surprising since pornographic videos containing all of these themes are readily available.”

Pumpster’s Comment: Yes, all of these themes are readily available—for sick fucking psychos like yourself!

Layden’s Quote: “Pornography viewers tend to have problems with premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction.”

Pumpster’s Comment: Sure seems to us these types would not be very good candidates for porn addiction.

Layden’s Quote: “I have also seen in my clinical experience that pornography damages the sexual performance of the viewers.”

Pumpster’s Comment: We’d love to see just what you’ve “seen!” A brilliant fucking idea for a reality porn site, doc: group of dysfunctional dudes in a room with 10 totally smoking chicks, all struggling to sexually perform, but failing--but the first one that does wins $10,000! Dr. Layden, please contact us ASAP at info@pumpster.com if you’d be interested in co-producing a project!

Layden’s Quote: “Having spent so much time in unnatural sexual experiences with paper, celluloid and cyberspace, they [porn users] seem to find it difficult to have sex with a real human being.”

Pumpster’s Comment: We don’t know about the wise doctor’s experience, but after spending a lot of time having sexual experiences with paper, celluloid, and cyberspace, we normally have a number of new sexual positions under our belt that make our wives and girlfriends scream like banshees! Okay, sometimes they do laugh at us, too. :)

Layden’s Quote: “No healthy six-year-old growing up in a healthy home environment says, ‘I hope I grow up to be a porn star, stripper or prostitute.’”

Pumpster’s Comment: If that home environment and that six-year-old child is so “healthy," what is he or she doing with knowledge of porn stars, strippers, and prostitutes?

Layden’s Quote: The experience I find most common among the performers is that they have to be drunk, high or dissociated in order to go to work. Their work environment is particularly toxic.

Pumpster’s Comment: We don’t mean to be disrespectful to the good doctor, but wouldn’t people in porn production have more knowledge about the work environment? We can’t speak for every production facility, but the office and set we work on is filled with great, normal, fun-loving people who have a blast at work and who love what they do. They are open minded and their belief systems are not hampered with toxic hang-ups and toxic religio-centered social mores.

Layden’s Quote: "They [porn users] have about a 25 % chance of making a marriage that lasts as long as 3 years.

Pumpster’s Comment: Hey, isn’t this the same statistic for Walmart employees?

Layden’s Quote: My clinical experience indicates that the spouses of porn viewers are often depressed, and are more likely to have eating disorders, body image disorders and low self-esteem.

Pumpster’s Comment: Don’t the spouses of just about everybody in the United States suffer from the exact same things?

Layden’s Quote: “He’s masturbating inside her body while he is having sex with the women on the screen.”

Pumpster’s Comment: Wow, that’s a fucking brilliant line for a song! Doc, you’re a poet and you don’t even know it!

Layden’s Quote: The children also show the damage.

Pumpster’s Comment: What? As in show-and-tell? The mind is a terrible thing to waste, Dr. Layden.

Layden’s Quote: As pornography becomes normalized, it is left around the house. Children can get exposed to it.

Pumpster’s Comment: We don’t even have children, but we still hide our porn under the bed or behind a box in the bedroom closet, just like our fathers had!

Layden’s quote: [A] large number [of children] believed that the only use of the Internet was for pornographic material.

Pumpster’s Comment: We’re not brain surgeons or whatever like Dr. Mary Layden, but this sounds like the parent’s fault, not porn’s.

Layden’s quote: Children who have porn-viewing fathers complain that when he looks at them it feels “creepy”. The parental gaze has now become the “porn gaze”.

Pumpster’s Comment: WTF? The only “creepy” thing here is that weird quote!

Layden’s Quote: The child of the porn user finds that everything is now about sex.

Pumpster’s Unquote: The child viewing television finds that everything IS about sex!

Layden’s Quote: If pornography made us healthy, we would be healthy by now.

Pumpster’s Unquote: If TV made us healthy, we would be healthy by now.

Layden’s Quote: There are no studies and no data that indicate a benefit from pornography use.

Pumpster’s Comment: And we’re sure, being such an open-minded, intelligent doc, that you really looked at all the data without bias, as it certainly appears you spent countless hours on the sets and in the offices of hundreds of adult entertainment businesses and that you also unceasingly tried to locate just one porn viewer or performer who is normal, healthy, and loves their life, spouse, job, and God! You go, girl!